the condom got lost in my hair
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Randomize
