Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
