One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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