How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
