My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
