Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
