OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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