What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
he shaved USA in his pubs
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
