i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I got inside last night via doggy door
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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