His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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