Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Randomize
