Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I am mentally ready for anal.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
