I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
