her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
