i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Randomize
