I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
