Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
