I think my fart just growled at me.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
