if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
