ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize