just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
