ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
dude i'm inner monologue high
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
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