i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
