What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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