God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
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