I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
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