I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
