I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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