2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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