I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
