How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
It's just like the Real World with babies
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Randomize
