Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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