Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
