He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
