I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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