Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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