In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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