All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
