Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
