walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
