Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Randomize