Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
