i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
