do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
