Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I cockslap morals
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
