found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I am available for nakedness
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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