he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
