hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
