Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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