I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
