Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize